This section is from the book "Hill's Manual Of Social And Business Forms: A Guide To Correct Writing", by Thos. E. Hill. Also available from Amazon: Hill's Manual Of Social And Business Forms: The How-To-Do-Everything Book Of Victorian America.
AMONG the delightful titbits that afford variety and merriment on certain festal occasions, may be toasts and sentiments, thus:
"Christmas hospitality: And the ladies who make it delightful by their mincing ways."
"The sports of the holidays: Sleighing the Dears, and taking comfort among the Buffaloes."
"Our opinion on the Eastern Question: We agree with Russia, that Turkey ought to he gobbled."
"The health of our venerable host: Although an American citizen, he is one of the best Grand Seniors that ever presided over Turkey."
"Thanksgiving: The magnetic festival that brings back erratic wanderers to the Old Folks at Home."
"The thanksgiving board: While it groans with plenty within, who cares for the whistling of the wind without."
"Thanksgiving: The religious and social festival that converts every family mansion into a Family Meeting House."
"The American Eagle: The older he grows the louder he screams, and the higher he flies."
"The Union of the States, and the Union of the Sexes:The one was the beginning of man's independence, the other is the end of it."
"Our Standard Sheet: It has often been badly mangled, and terribly scorched, but is, nevertheless, the noblest sheet that ever covered a hero on the bed of glory."
"Our Host and Hostess: The fire of affection they mutually kindled five years ago has not gone out; on the contrary, we are glad to see them wooding up."
"The Hero and Heroine of this Wooden Festival: May they flourish like green bay trees in their youth, and retain all their pith when they
"Tin Weddings; And the bright reflections to which they give rise."
"Crystal Weddings: The medium through which the bliss of enduring affection is magnified, reflected, and made transparent to everybody."
"The fifteenth year of Wedlock: A matrimonial Stage, chiefly remarkable for its Tumblers."
"Our Hospitable Hostess: And may it never be her fate to look on life 'as through a glass darkly.'"
"The Bridal Pair: Their admirable performances in double harness well entitle them to the plate."
"Our Kind Entertainers: Know all men, by these presents, how sincerely we love them."
* Selected from Barber's Ready-made Speeches, published by Dick & Fitzgerald, New York.