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Couple Dynamics: A Guide to Sexual/Emotional Enhancement | by Dr. Sean Haldane



The methods suggested in this book, although therapy-based, are really dependent on self-exploration by you and your partner. True sexuality and emotional fulfillment require quality time and intimate attention. The longer you explore and the deeper each partner is willing to delve, the richer the experience will become. In exploring these areas of intimate experience, I found the couples who consulted me were not usually at ease with the intrusion of a therapist. It was because of this revelation that the couples work described in Couple Dynamics emerged.

TitleCouple Dynamics: A Guide to Sexual/Emotional Enhancement
AuthorDr. Sean Haldane
PublisherNew Horizon Press
Year1985
Copyright1985
AmazonCouple Dynamics: A Guide to Sexual/Emotional Enhancement
book cover

New Horizon Press

Note: Published on chestofbooks.com in digital format with an explicit permission from Sean Haldane. The copyright remains with Sean Haldane.

All rights reserved. Except for brief quotations for review purposes, no part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording, or an information retrieval system, without written permission from the publisher.

Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Data

Haldane, Sean.

Couple dynamics.

Bibliography: p.

1. Marital psychotherapy. 2. Self-care, Health. 3. Interpersonal relations. I. Title. [DNLM: 1. Interpersonal Relations—popular works. 2. Marriage—popular works. HQ 734 H1582c]

RC488.5.H25 1985 616.89'156 85-5106

ISBN 0-8828-012-5 (New Horizon Press)

ISBN 0-8290-1586-8 (Irvington Publishers)

Manufactured in the United States of America

-Introduction
When I began my work as a psychotherapist, I noticed that the couples best able to work through the challenges, conflicts, and changes of their relationship ...
-Introduction. Continued
Other couples may do the work intensely for a brief period then find they have had enough. Joe and Lisa, for example, had a rather dramatic success which ...
-Chapter 1. Guidelines For Couple Exploration
During the chapters which follow, a couple may explore, in a series of structured sessions of work together, the emotional dynamics of their personalities and ...
-Guidelines For Couple Exploration. Part 2
Preconditions Obviously anyone can try this work, but I want to emphasize that if you are in a bad relationship these explorations may serve to open up the ...
-Guidelines For Couple Exploration. Part 3
Areas Of Focus Each chapter focuses on a specific area in observation and work. I suggest that you follow them in sequence, going through one per session. This ...
-Chapter 2. Making Contact
Each chapter that deals with explorations begins with a suggested sequence for work in one session. Related issues will then be discussed. In suggesting the ...
-Making Contact. Part 2
In the next part of the session you will be encouraging the explorer to move and change a little. The key words are breathe out, let go, give in. You will be ...
-Making Contact. Part 3
2:8 Observe the breathing and encourage the explorer to fill from the abdomen up and empty from the chest down. This may be a fairly smooth movement in which ...
-Making Contact. Part 4
Pulsation Pulsation is most clearly felt and observable in the breathing. It is a rhythmic expansion and contraction which is the sign of life. If a person ...
-Chapter 3. Exploring Emotions
This chapter will suggest ways that both of you can explore your four basic emotions: fear, anger, grief and joy. These can often be evoked through a ...
-Exploring Emotions. Part 2
Anger 2:1 Starting from normal breathing, on the back, knees up, ask the explorer to imitate anger. They may frown and concentrate the eyes, or they may open ...
-Exploring Emotions. Part 3
Emotions And Blocks The extent to which the explorer will have been able to enter deeply into any of the emotional expressions explored will vary. Some people ...
-Exploring Emotions. Part 4
Fear In chronic blocking of fear, the face may be set by a series of chronic muscle spasms in a mask of defiance or an expression of frozen fear. In the case ...
-Exploring Emotions. Part 5
Focus And Diffusion You may have noticed during the explorations of the emotions that in both the explorer's experience of the emotion and in the guide's ...
-Chapter 4. Physical Emotional Armor
While working on your relationship as a couple you will most certainly observe that in each of your bodies and behavior the pattern of defense, or armor, ...
-Physical Emotional Armor. Part 2
Flight-Toward I have trouble with this ER and its associated structure because, in my experience, it never exists in a pure form. However, colleagues have ...
-Physical Emotional Armor. Part 3
Flight-Toward/Away This is not a captive ambivalence, as in fight-fright, but a mobile one in which the explorer runs precisely toward that which causes most ...
-Chapter 5. Emotional Growth Through Intensification
Intensification Work The explorations in this book are mainly concerned with expression, with letting tension out. However, intensification of tension is a ...
-Chapter 6. Dismantling Armor
Emotion has been explored thus far as a movement of sensation and tension in the body. Only some of an individual's emotional expression can be observed from ...
-Dismantling Armor. Part 2
The explorations suggested in this chapter involve a systematic working down through the body's muscular segments, as follows: 1. The ocular (eye) segment ...
-Dismantling Armor. Ocular Segment
1:1 Ask the explorer to roll the eyes around in all directions, reversing direction from time to time, and to really stretch to see as far out to the sides, ...
-Dismantling Armor. Oral Segment
Work on this segment is of two types: movement of the mouth and jaw and the making of sounds. Sounds are important since there is a feedback loop between ...
-Dismantling Armor. Throat Segment
This segment can be considered first as a kind of bridge between the very expressive oral and thoracic segments. Growling, snarling, kissing, and sucking are ...
-Dismantling Armor. Chest Segment
This segment, despite its name, comprises the back and front of the body above the waist, including shoulders and arms. Apart from being the site of deep ...
-Dismantling Armor. Diaphragmatic Segment
The diaphragm is a dome-like sheet of muscle attached to the bottom of the rib cage. It is not externally palpable so it cannot be worked on by direct touch.
-Dismantling Armor. Abdominal Segment
This includes the abdominal wall, between diaphragm and groin, as well as the flanks around to the back opposite the navel, although this segment is much ...
-Dismantling Armor. Pelvic Segment
This includes pelvis, buttocks, pelvic floor, legs and feet. You can test the functional unity of this segment by standing and tightening your buttocks: this ...
-Dismantling Armor. Pelvic Segment. Continued
The goal of therapy is not to induce involuntary trembling, although in Lowen's bioenergetic therapy it is so important that it does become the goal. Group ...
-Dismantling Armor. Pelvic Floor
The final step in therapy is dissolving blocks in the pelvic floor so that its spontaneous pulsatory movement becomes integrated into movements of the pelvis, ...
-Chapter 7. Enriching Sexual Life
Most men and women feel the need for an erotic/ genital relationship with a loved partner. True passion is both romantic and sexual and gratifies both ...
-Enriching Sexual Life. Part 2
So the goal of therapy and of couples work is not perfection. Nor is it the elimination of all forms of armor. Armor is sometimes useful. But it should be ...
-Enriching Sexual Life. Part 3
Emergency Responses In Sexual Anxiety Do remember that the chronic ERs are simplified descriptions and that you or your partner may exhibit more than one of ...
-Enriching Sexual Life. Part 4
Flight-Toward The extreme of this ER would function entirely like a baby and does not exist in an adult. (The strong component of flight-toward in the ...
-Enriching Sexual Life. Part 5
Fight Here sex is an arena for domination. The genitals are used to impress, control, and perform with a compulsive pride in the capacity to please the partner.
-Enriching Sexual Life. Part 6
Regression Little is known about sensory life before birth but it would seem that the fetus' feelings must be extremely diffuse or oceanic. Embryo and fetus ...
-Chapter 8. Sharing Natural Marriage
According to some modern sexologists, if you can afford a vibrator, have access to the visual stimulation afforded by pornographic video or magazines, have ...
-Sharing Natural Marriage. Part 2
Matches And Mismatches On the one hand there is no need to describe what happens when people fall in love and form a natural marriage; on the other hand, a ...
-Sharing Natural Marriage. Part 3
Time And Timing Many problems in marriage can only be understood if carefully examined in terms of time and its various elements: timing, mutual rhythms, ...
-Sharing Natural Marriage. Part 4
Family Matters The origin of the human armor against pleasure is a puzzle. Many modern thinkers have believed that the origin of human ills must somehow be in ...
-Sharing Natural Marriage. Part 5
Pregnancy For many couples, the first months of pregnancy are the first threat to their sexual life. At best the woman is tired, at worst quite sick; she may ...
-Sharing Natural Marriage. Part 6
Nursing Booze and snooze, the occasional glass of Port wine plus an extra nap during the day, are the old-fashioned remedies for nursing mothers. A modern ...
-Chapter 9. Consultation
If it has fulfilled its purpose, this book has helped you become more aware of how you relate to your partner in various areas of emotional and sexual contact.
-Chapter 10. Summaries Of Explorations
You should be careful to read the fuller versions of these explorations in the relevant chapters before attempting to use these summaries. Once you are ...
-Summaries Of Explorations. Part 2
Third Session: Emotional Growth Through Intensification (Chapter 5) Page 77 1:1 Ask the explorer to find a position on the mat, following the first instincts ...
-Summaries Of Explorations. Part 3
Chest Segment (page 99) 4:1 Ask the explorer to lie face down. 4:2 Ask them to sigh out audibly. 4:3 Ask them to keep the neck loose. 4:4 Press down with the ...
-Afterword
He's changed. She won't change Our lives have changed. Only in the fairy tales we read as children do the prince and princess meet, fall in love and live ...
-References
* Ambrosi, Jean. L'Analyse Psycho-energetique. Paris: Retz, 1979. * Baker, Elsworth F. Man in the Trap. New York: Macmillan, 1967;paper 1980. * Bateson, ...









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