This section of the book is from the "Household Companion: The Home Book Of Etiquette" book.
When the funeral is at the house, some near relative or intimate friend should act as usher, and show the company to their seats.
A decorous silence should be preserved in the chamber of death, no one speaking except in low, sabdued tones. The members of the family are not obliged to recognize their acquaintances. The latter show their sympathy by their presence and considerate silence.
The coffin, if in good taste, will never be unduly elaborate or over ornamented. A black cloth casket, with plain silver mountings, is preferable to any other.
The clergyman usually stands in a position as nearly as possible midway between the family and assembled friends, so that his words may be heard by all. The family remain seated together, usually in some room upstairs, and never appear until it becomes necessary to enter the carriages. If the funeral be in church, they occupy the front pews, the intimate friends sitting immediately behind them.
Six or eight of the most intimate male friends of the person who has died are invited by the family to act as pall-bearers. On the day of the funeral they assemble at the house, and the undertaker provides each of them with black gloves and a mourner's scarf. They walk with their heads uncovered beside the coffin, up the aisle, if the services be held in church, and also escort the body to the grave. They usually sit in one of the front pews, reserved for their use, while the funeral services are being conducted.