This section is from the book "Handbook Of Suggestive Therapeutics, Applied Hypnotism, Psychic Science", by Henry S. Munro. Also available from Amazon: Handbook of Suggestive Therapeutics, Applied Hypnotism, Psychic Science.
Many marriages too early in life are entered into under the influence of emotion, or the stimulus of animal passion, which is mistaken for love. Psychic qualifications do not enter into such relations as an incentive to the selection of a mate. Later on in life man's psychic nature is stronger in its influence upon him than mere animal passion, and sexual intercourse without the stimulus of the higher elements of congeniality produces a surfeit, a disgust, and positive repulsion in perfect accord with the laws of his higher nature.
Man is a being of intelligence, with moral and social ideals, aspi-ration, reason, ambition, knowledge, perception, and judgment, and, where a union is maintained without congeniality in regard to these higher evolutionary factors of personality, but only as a means of gratifying his animal passions, intercourse is robbed of the essential psychic elements which produce a favorable reaction upon mind and body, without which it is prostitution pure and simple.
Beastiality, or the act of having intercourse with a brute, is not an uncommon occurrence among the uneducated negroes of the southern states. A horse has been known to be the instrument for this disgusting act by a man in whom the higher psychic qualities had not been developed. The sexual act is the same in effect when a man has intercourse with a prostitute, who grants him the privilege of using her body to produce orgasm for a price, as in the instance where the horse was employed. In both instances the essential psychic elements were lacking, and only an individual who has smothered every worthy quality within him, or one in whom they had never been evolved, could engage in such a disgusting relation.
Just in proportion as man rises in the scale of evolution, or has become more civilized, does his sexual instincts become more refined and ennobled, and the qualities of mind and character enter his ideal of what his conjugal mate should be.
Like attracts like in the mating instinct as in other departments of nature. The feminine nature is drawn by the man who most nearly conforms to her ideal of what a man should be. Beckey, a popular young negress, was infatuated by Jordan, the strongest negro on the farm because he was more than the equal of the other negro men when a test of strength was made at loading cotton, carrying logs, splitting rails, and in all places where physical endurance was the test of manhood. He was also a born fighter, and she gloried in his virile qualities manifested in the most primitive way.
Mary, another negress, was a great church devotee, and no negro man in the neighborhood stood in her estimation as compared with Lewis, the young deacon. She was proud to become his wife because he measured up to her highest ideal of what she conceived a man should be.
And all along up in the scale of civilization, from the lowest to the highest, woman is attracted most by the man who is nearest the embodiment of the physical and psychic qualities which most nearly conform to her ideal. The masculine nature is drawn by the woman who most strongly believes in him, and he naturally desires to be her protector. He is strengthened and encouraged by her confidence, comforted by her sympathy in the battles against environment, and in all of life's struggles made more of a man by her self-sacrifices for his success.
The types of individuality are as varied as are men and women in the world, and among them all this natural sex attraction is in evidence. A woman's ideal of what a man should be depends upon her training, as determined by environment and education. According to her development is she prepared to appreciate the highest qualities of ideal manhood, and she is instinctively drawn to the man most nearly representing in her estimation the characteristics of what true manhood should be; and man is drawn to the woman who most nearly conforms to his ideal of womanly perfection. This element of sympathy pertains more to psychic than to physical qualities, and in this alone does man differ most conspicuously in sexual instincts from those manifested by the brute. Nothing so helps in the making of a man as the love, and confidence, and helpful co-operation of a woman who truly believes in him. She is the vis a tergo - the power behind the throne - the mainspring to man's effort at doing and being something in the world in which he lives, and a true woman wishes no higher place in life than to inspire one man to put forth his energies in the performance of useful, helpful service to mankind.
To help him in his work by her love and helpful co-operation and kindly sympathy, and to know that she is justly appreciated by her hero, is the reward that the normal, sane, wholesome woman seeks above all else in the world.
It is but the manifestation of the normal sexual instinct in man that is manifested in any and every line of wholesome, useful, conscientious endeavor, in all that pertains to making himself and family a living, educating and developing them, and contributing his best efforts for the betterment of humanity; and it is but the manifestation of the normal sexual instinct in woman to help him, believe in him, love and encourage him, and so reign as the queen of his home that in her kingdom he can obtain peace and happiness, joy and comfort, and the rest that he needs from a life of, care and responsibility.
No human being can stand alone very long unless supported by the love and helpful co-operation of other human beings with whom he is related. As the head of a home, man's life is a fight between himself and the entire world, and his comrade, his fighting mate, his inspiration and encouragement, his best help, must come from the wife who loves him, believes in him and his work, and stands ever ready to contribute all within her power to his happiness and success.
With over ten thousand suicides and fifty thousand divorces yearly in the United States,; with our overcrowded insane asylums, hospitals, and penitentiaries; with weakness, impotency, incompetency and disease thronging our cities, the time has arrived when physicians, and laity as well, should face this question of the guidance of the sexual instinct in the young, so as to equip them to live sane, useful, normal, healthful, happy lives as a means of preventing the disastrous consequences which result from ignorance concerning the power inherent in all human beings, and we should take such measures as would prevent the fate of all who are allowed to drift unguided along in the world into disease, unhappi-ness, and degeneracy on account of the failure of educators to enlighten them upon the simple, practical questions of every-day Life. And in efforts to educate and enlighten the young and older people as well it should be remembered that education may be ever so good, principles of life ever so high, but, unless they are in harmony with nature's laws and meet the requirements of the normal, natural individual, they fall short of meeting the requirements of the needs of mankind.