I have been keeping company with a young man for about four years. He is very much in love with me, but, although I enjoy being with him, my feeling is a "like" and not "love."
He has always been very good to me, and has done just as I asked; but now he feels I owe at least one "favor"- using a contraceptive, which, he says, will make everything all right-even to the point that I would still be a "virgin." I don't know much about this sort of thing, but can't seem to think that it: is right to do this when I have no intention of marrying this same fellow.
He is leaving the decision up to me, so I am turning to you for the correct answer as to whether this is right or wrong I am perfectly willing to do it, providing it is right.
As we argue continually over this, and never come to a definite conclusion, please answer soon and set us straight.
Miss X. X., New York.
Although your question does not come within the realm of sex science, and should be one for your spiritual adviser to answer, you have brought up such very important ethical and moral issues that I cannot help offering my opinion.
In the first place, though "virginity" is a rather loose term, it means that a woman has never at any time had sexual communion with a man. I cannot possibly conceive just how your "friend" expects to have physical intercourse with you, and you still remain a virgin. You are quite correct when you state that you do not know very much about this "sort of thing." Giving in to your "friend's" suggestion will only bring you grief, in the future, when you meet a man whom you truly "love" and you wish to marry him.
My answer, of course, is NO! under any circumstances, and I would also sincerely advise you to let this "friend" go. If he had any respect for you, he would have never suggested it.
I hope you will understand a strange inquiry; I am making it for my sister.
She is married and has no feeling for her husband; she is addicted to what they call "self-abuse." Can she ever have children ?
Mrs, G. L,, Virginia.
Frigidity and "self-abuse" have no particular bearing on the child-bearing functions; as pregnancy depends entirely on the physical condition of the sexual organs. Frigidity is a mental and emotional state and. In the case you write about, is in all probability due to the prolonged habit of "self-abuse." Self-abuse in the woman is much more serious than in the man and. if carried over for any great length of time, tends to produce a disinclination toward normal marital relations.
This person should consult a physician who has had some experience in handling problems of this kind; or it may soon lead to some serious form of mental disturbance.